Guidos Gone Wilde

If you're an educated person with any knowledge of Oscar Wilde and his ways... and you picture him living, not in the nineteenth century, but in the present day...then, this might not be such a big stretch of the imagination. I mean, I read The Picture of Dorian Gray in college and, let me tell you, that bad boy was like a cross between A-rod and Dexter... or perhaps the Ice Truck Killer... it was art, after all.

But while I may not be 100% decided on which modern day celebrities Mr. Wilde most resembles, there is one thing of which I'm absolutely certain: Oscar Wilde would have logged some pretty serious hours at the Jersey Shore. And, with that in mind, I give you the Jersey Shore transcripts, as performed by the stars of Broadway's The Importance of Being Earnest. Because, frankly, it's the way he would've wanted it.